If the new love in your life is telling you they are going to buy you amazing, expensive gifts it can be pretty overwhelming. Especially if you’re in a tricky space where you might not be able to say no. It can be really difficult to turn down a car if you’re relying on public transport, or even a fancy new apartment if you are itching to get out of where you’re living.
In a recent article, we spoke about Mzansi’s Culture of Credit, and how easy it is for us to rely on money we don’t have to get the things we want. This is not limited to our own things though. We all have to admit that flashing a little cash around can make us feel great. Especially if there’s a certain person we would like to impress. We’re human, we like to show that we’ve got this game down and that we are crushing it at every turn.
The pressure is at its height when it comes to picking a partner. Whether they are your future bride or your Friday night, there is a tendency to whip out the wad and spend. While there are plenty who will criticise, the reality is that money and status are valued in all societies, so it’s natural to show-off a bit when one has these things.
However, when we don’t have these things, it gets complicated. It can be too easy to stress about getting them, whether by hook or by crook. Whether it’s maxing out the next credit card or trading a few dinner dates for rent and new wheels, human beings find ways to get what we want. The big “but” comes in when these decisions come with strings attached.
Not the emotional kind, the Debt Collector kind.
If you have been relying on someone else to pay your bills, whether it’s your credit card, your rent or your car repayment, and that person decides that they’re not paying anymore, you’ve got a problem.
You will need to check whose name that debt is in. If you have been “given” a car, but you haven’t been paying for it, do you know who it belongs to? Was it really theirs to give, or does it still belong the bank? If that’s the case, can you even afford these repayments?
This goes for any kind of expensive gift. If you can’t afford to pay for it yourself now, make sure that you’re not on the hook to pay for it later. Whether it’s being handed a credit card with no budget, or a fancy apartment in an upmarket area, check who’s name it’s in! If it’s in your name, you will need to be able to pay for it. If it’s not, remember that it does not belong to you. You’re only borrowing it.
Already paying back last year’s birthday present?
If you’re already in this situation and cannot even think about letting your pricey present get repossessed, chat to a debt counsellor to see what your options are. While you might or might not have legal recourse, depending on the situation, you can only benefit from some expert advice.
Our professional debt counsellors can help you manage your debt, by guiding you on budgeting, negotiating with your creditors and assessing your ability to make the repayments required, while maintaining a dignified lifestyle. Once you have repaid all your debt, there are legal avenues to repair your credit history, even if your heart is still a bit broken.
With Solace, you’re not alone.
